Dangerous friendship

Dangerous Dosti:
.
Main Ghar Late aaya toh Dad ne Pucha: "Where were you..?"
.
Maine kaha:
"Friend ke Ghar tha.."
.
Dad ne Mere hi Saamne Mere 10 Friends ko Call Kiya..
.
4 ne Kaha: "Haan Uncle, Yahin par tha.."
.
2 ne Kaha: "Abhi Just Nikla hai.."
.
3 ne Kaha: "Yahin hai Uncle, Padh Raha hai, Phone du Kya..?"
.
1 ne Tho Had hi Kar Di, Kaha: "Haan Pappa Bolo Kya Hua"...!!
.
PITWA DIYA SALO NEY

Punjabiyan di wakhri ada

Punjabi de hath Jin lag giya..

Jin - koi 3 wishes mango mere aka.

Punjabi- ik daaru di botle pesh kar, jehdi kdi v khatm na hoye..

Botle aa gyi te punjabi ne ik steel da glass bhar liya. Akhri PEG de nal hi, botle fir bhar gyi.
Punjabi khush.
Pher peen lagga,
mukde saar botle fer full.

Jin ne 2 hor wishes mangan layi kiha.

Punjabi- (bohat khush ho k) -

Ehde naal diyaan 2 botlaan hor liya....!!!

Buuuurrrraaaa..;)

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Convent scool k bache zoo me - oh !! wow monky is sleeping don't disturb.. Punjab Govt. Scool k bache -OH VEKH TERA PEO SUTA PYA..WATA MAAR SAALE DE ...

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3 diff styles of proposing:

English- would you mind being my gf ? I really like you.

Hindi- kya aap meri premika banogi ? Mujhe tum achchi lagti ho.

Punjabi- velli firdi hai! Kisi gareeb de kam hi aa ja.

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Afgani : Hamare registaan mein 'khushamdid' bolo to vapis awaz aati hai ... amdid...amdid...amdid

Himachali : hamare pahado mein 'i love u' bolo to vapis awaz ati hai. love u...love u...love u....

Punjabi:Es vich kedi gal hai sade pind di gali vich awaz maro 'teri bhen di' te vapas awaz andi hai 'teri Maa di... teri maa di...

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DRIVING IN PUNJAB.

(1)The one who drives faster than you gets:
"Vekh kiwen agg laggi aa kanjar nu..."

(2)The one who drives slower than you gets:
"Gaddi chalauni aundi nai.. Par laini zaroor aa..".

(3)And finally the one who drives equal to you:
"Achha, Peo naal raceaan!!!"

Over confidence

1.Once, all villagers decided to pray for rain, on the day of prayer all
the People gathered but only one boy came with an umbrella.
THAT'S FAITH!

2. When you throw a baby in the air, she laughs because she knows you will catch her.
THAT'S TRUST!

3.Every night we go to bed, without any assurance of being alive the next
Morning but still we set the alarms  to wake up.
THAT'S HOPE!

4. We plan big things for tomorrow in spite of zero knowledge of the future.
THAT'S CONFIDENCE!

5. We see the world suffering....

But still we get married !!!

THAT'S " OVER CONFIDENCE ! "

Power of wife

Power of Wife 

Shohar biwi se:- ye kya tum 1 or suit ley aayi? Abhi parso hii toh...

Biwi chilla kar boli:-

Kya parso?
Bolo......
Bolo kya kaha tum ne?
Ruk kyun gaye?
Kya parso,
Parso kya,
Bolo jaldi!
Jaldi bolo na,
Batao kya parso....?

Shohar: kuch nahi, mai bus yeh keh raha tha ki parso bhi eak hee suit lai thi pagli, aaj toh 2 le aati.....

New drugs for men

New Drugs For MEN Created By WOMEN Scientists...

ANIVERSIA: Triggers Memories for Birthdays and Anniversaries.

SLIMOXIL: Widens Male Cornea Making Wives Appear Slim.

SPORTOBLIND X: Reacts With optic Nerve To Prevent Men From Recognizing The Word "Sports" On TV.

WORKOCETAMOL: Generates an Insatiable Desire In Men To Do Household Chores.

SHOPHOFOBEX: Makes Men Eager To Take Wives For Shopping Every Week And Wait Patiently.

FLIRTONATE-N: It Reduces Vision Whenever A Pretty girl passes by!!

Husband wife awesome

. Few classics:- Just for laugh...

An intelligent wife is one who spends so much that her husband can't afford another woman.
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Cool message by a woman: Dear mother-in-law,"­don't teach me how to handle my children,I'm living with one of yours and he needs a lot of improvement."
***************­***********
A kid was beaten by his mom.
Dad came home and asked, What happened son??
Kid said, can't adjust with your wife anymore, I need my own.?
***************­***********
In an African safari, a lion suddenly bounced on wife.
Wife: Shoot him! Shoot him!
Husband: Yes, yes. I'm changing the battery in my camera..
***************­*************
What is the difference between mother and wife?
One woman brings you into this world crying and the other ensures you continue to do so.

Husband wife series

This is the best and most civil way to have a fight between husband and wife instead of resorting to physical force...

Poems written by WIFE and HUSBAND.

                             WIFE:
I wrote your name on sand it got washed..
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away.
Then I wrote your name on my heart & I got Heart Attack.

                           HUSBAND:
God saw me hungry, he created pizza.
He saw me thirsty, he created Pepsi.
He saw me in the dark, he created light.
He saw me without problems, he created YOU.

                             WIFE:
Twinkle twinkle little star
You should know what you are
And once you know what you are
Mental hospital is not so far

                     HUSBAND:
The rain makes all things beautiful.
The grass and flowers too.
If rain makes all things beautiful
Why doesn't it rain on you?

                     WIFE:
Roses are red; Violets are blue
Monkeys like u should be kept in zoo.
Don't feel so angry you will find me there too
Not in cage but outside, laughing at you
 
AND THE SAGA CONTINUES........

Position of a Husband Is just like a Split AC
No matter however Loud he is in the Outdoor
He is designed to remain Silent indoor....
......................................................................
"Husband is one who is the head of the family,

but his wife is the neck, and whichever way she turns, he goes."
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A man in Hell asked Devil:
Can I make a call to my Wife?
After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free.
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Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE?

It means, Without Information, Fighting Everytime!
Wife: No darling, it means - With Idiot For Ever
............................................................................
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper,
So I'd be in your hands all day.

Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper,
So I could have a new one every day.
..................................................................

Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping Pills.

Wife: When must I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you
....................................................................

Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are..

Husband: You should have known it the minute I asked you to marry me.
.....................................................................

Wife: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest ?
Husband: A lovely Push...!

and the life goes on........!!!!!

Women and cars

Women are the best vehicles in the world because:-
---2 beautiful headlights in the front
---2 great bumpers at the back
---Self -lubricating when hot
---Finger touch ignition
---Automatic engine oil change every month
---Any type of piston fits.
---Multiple seating styles & adjustments
----Great accessories
---Highest mileage 9months with just 5ml refill
---That's why MEN are dying to own one