Bob returned from a doctor's visit and told his wife Alma that the doctor said he only had 24 hours to live.
Wiping away her tears, he asked her to make love with him. Of course she agreed and they made passionate love.
Six hours later, Bob went to her again, and said, "Honey, now I only have 18 hours left to live. Maybe we could make love again?" Alma agreed and again they made love.
Later, Bob was getting into bed when he realized he now had only eight hours of life left.
He touched Alma's shoulder and said, "Honey Please? Just one more time before I die." She agreed, then afterwards she rolled over and fell asleep.
Bob, however, heard the clock ticking in his head, and he tossed and turned until he was down to only four more hours.
He tapped his wife on the shoulder to wake her up. "Honey, I only have four hours left! Could we...?"
His wife sat up abruptly, turned to him and said, "Listen Bob, I have to get up in the morning for your funeral & You don't have to get up !!!
Monday
Saturday
Girl Vs Mechanical Engineer
A guy asked a girl in a library, “Do
you mind if I sit beside you?”
The girl answered with a loud voice, “I DO NOT WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOUUU!!!!!”
All of the students in the library started staring at the guy. He was very embarrassed.
After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy’s table and told him, “I study psychology and I know what a man is thinking. Let me guess, you were embarrassed, huh?” The guy responded with a loud voice, “200 DOLLARS FOR ONE NIGHT?!?!?! THAT’S TOO MUCH!!!”
…and all the people in the library looked at the girl in shock.
The guy leaned over and whispered, “I study Mechanical engineering, and I know how to screw people
The girl answered with a loud voice, “I DO NOT WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOUUU!!!!!”
All of the students in the library started staring at the guy. He was very embarrassed.
After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy’s table and told him, “I study psychology and I know what a man is thinking. Let me guess, you were embarrassed, huh?” The guy responded with a loud voice, “200 DOLLARS FOR ONE NIGHT?!?!?! THAT’S TOO MUCH!!!”
…and all the people in the library looked at the girl in shock.
The guy leaned over and whispered, “I study Mechanical engineering, and I know how to screw people
Friday
Pappu's Offer
Pappu, walked into a Bar and aggressively shouted his order to the bar man,
”Please give me half chicken tandoori and then give everyone half a kilo steak and mutton, bcoz when I eat, I want everyone to eat!”
Bar man processed his request and gave him his meal and everyone else their meals.
When they finished enjoying their meal he shouted for another order,
”Give me a bottle of Champagne and give everybody else a bottle of Johnny Walker Black, bcoz when I drink, I want everybody to drink!”
Everyone was happy and singing praises, saying Pappu is “The Man”.
When Pappu finished his drink he shouted again:
“Give me my bill and give everyone else their own bill, bcoz when I pay, I want everyone to pay ”. . .
Pappu's funeral is tomorrow
”Please give me half chicken tandoori and then give everyone half a kilo steak and mutton, bcoz when I eat, I want everyone to eat!”
Bar man processed his request and gave him his meal and everyone else their meals.
When they finished enjoying their meal he shouted for another order,
”Give me a bottle of Champagne and give everybody else a bottle of Johnny Walker Black, bcoz when I drink, I want everybody to drink!”
Everyone was happy and singing praises, saying Pappu is “The Man”.
When Pappu finished his drink he shouted again:
“Give me my bill and give everyone else their own bill, bcoz when I pay, I want everyone to pay ”. . .
Pappu's funeral is tomorrow
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